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House of Other | No Means No with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Ep #10

No Means No Is Rock Bottom with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

For the last few weeks, we’ve been talking about assault and how to prevent it, as well as consent. We wanted to dive deeper into helping parents talk to their kids about sex and consent, and then I remembered that I actually had a great conversation about this last year with the incredible Dr. Alexandra Solomon.

Dr. Alexandra Solomon is a Clinical Assistant Professor at Northwestern University and a licensed Clinical Psychologist at The Family Institute at Northwestern University. She teaches what consent is and how “no means no” is the rock bottom, bare minimum of consent. She joins me to share why consent has a number of dimensions and is so much more than “no means no.”

If we don’t know the meaning of consent and how to engage with it, how can we teach our kids? This week, I’m revisiting my conversation with Dr. Solomon where we discuss how consent has changed since what we were taught growing up, why there is no black and white definition, and the model of consent we’re trying to move into. Hear what Dr. Solomon describes as consensual and non-consensual sex, and some tips and recommendations to help people talk about sex more comfortably.

What You Will Discover:

  • The problem with sex education in the U.S.
  • What I’ve learned from my kids about how consent has changed from what I was taught.
  • Where the orgasm gap is happening and the reason for it.
  • How the patriarchy hurts men as well as women.
  • Why every sexual problem in a relationship is a couple problem, not an individual problem.  
  • How Queer couples are generally having better consensual sex, and the reason why.
  • The importance of discussing what you are available for during sex.
  • Why so many people feel uncomfortable talking about sex.

Resources Mentioned:

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